The 9th Life of Louis DraxDVD
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Everyone said that one day I was going to have an accident. An accident to end all accidents. One day, you might look up and see a kid falling from the sky. That kid would be me. I'm Louis Drax, the amazing accident-prone boy. My first accident was being born. It happened like Julius Caesar. They stab the lady with the knife till her belly pops, and then they yank you out, all covered in blood.
My mom says I'm an angel. You know, Louis, they say cats have nine lives. Their souls cling to their bodies and won't let go. If you were a cat, you'd have used up eight of your lives by now. One for each year. Please don't use up any more.
You see, I believe that the brain is more than the sum of its parts. And that all of us, no matter how damaged, can make connections.
I know, we're not supposed to use the word, "miracle" in the medical profession, but this might call for an exception.
Your elevator makes me urinate.
-You have mild claustrophobia. Totally normal. You know, that elevator's tiny. You're way too big for it.
Not as big as you. Grownups are always laughing at things that aren't funny. - Squeak, squeak.
-You read any good books lately, you wanna tell me about?
I read the Bible.
-How'd you like it?
I liked the part with the snake. Mr. Snake.
-What's he doing? What's up with him, tell me about the snake.
Adam is so stupid. He deserves to be punished.
I'd like to sit in a chair all day and say, "Tell me more," and make zillions of dollars. I'd like that. Looks like an easy life.
-So you're telling me that you think that being a grownup is an easy life? You looking forward to that? You looking forward to growing up?
-Why is that a stupid question?
Because I'm never going to grow up.
She's getting eaten alive out there.
-I expect she's used to it by now. Men always behave like fools around pretty girls.
Ever since he was born, I've always been able to communicate, know what the other one was thinking, like twins. My god, it sounds stupid and superstitious, but... if you knew Louis, if you knew everything he's been through... He's not like other children, I think my son's an angel. It's not easy being the mother of a troubled boy. Always full of worry. Gotta protect him, gotta protect him.
If you could choose anybody in the world to be your dad, anybody.
Anybody, dead or alive.
My parents don't love each other, not the way that the lady and her husband with the Chinese children do.
We stayed in San Diego for the whole weekend so that we could give Mom a rest because we were both men, and sometimes, men can be too much of a good thing and give you a headache.
How are things with Sophie?
-Hanging by a string.
You and every husband.
-I don't think she loves me anymore.
Why should she? You don't love her anymore.
He's a liar like all men are, and he plays the same games they play, like, "Pretend You Don't Hate Him." Why don't you like men? Because they did bad things to my mom.
One of the secret rules is about pet keeping. If you own a small creature and he lives for longer than a small rodent's lifespan... that's two years... then you're allowed to kill him if you want to because you're his owner.
-Does the, um, the secret rule have a name?
Yes, "The Right of Disposal". "The Right of Disposal". You're allowed to do it with poison or weed killer, if you have any. Or you can just drop something heavy on him like a medical encyclopedia or "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."
... and he wobbled like a cartoon. You can guess the rest.
He's reading to me about monster tubeworms. They're gross to look at because one end's a butt and the other's a mouth.
Maybe I'm being unfair. I've just had a tough time with men, that's all.
-We're not all bad. Not... completely.
He was very smart that way. Children, they always know so much more than we think.
You said nothing would leave the room, and that wasn't true, so you suck.
She's endured a lot even before Louis' accident. Forgive me for feeling some compassion.
-Oh, well, if it's compassion, then my mistake.
Munchausen syndrome by proxy. Induced illness is the correct terminology. The victim abuses another, usually a child, in exchange for, you know, love, attention. When Louis was small, she had actually injured him herself. As he grew older, he learned what she wanted, you know, responded to her needs in exchange for love. She just had to be there, right? He'd have an accident, and she'd save him. And every time, it would strengthen the bond between them. She loved him, she hated him. Couldn't live with him, couldn't live without him.
I was happy because I had a baby bat. And that bat was the most amazing bat in the entire world. And I... loved him more than the whole house.
-More than the whole street?
More than all the fish in the sea.
-But the baby bat had problems and made everyone sad.
No! No! He was perfect and smart... and strange... and brilliant... and kind... and so loved. And I was proud of of him every single day.
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